You have to respect the crossover appeal of this popular basketball mantra.
It seems to frame the last bit of football news still lingering from the fall -- the secret search for a new Golden Valley football coach disguised as an elephant.
"Talk. Everybody needs to talk. Call out screens. If you got the ball, yell 'Ball!' If you're denying, yell 'Deny!'
James Burns, sports editor
(Here's the important part of this bit of dialogue.)
"When you don't say anything, that means you don't know what's going on -- you don't understand the play."
Right now, no one close to Golden Valley's search for a new football coach is saying much. Which should alarm you like a baby on a ledge, because the three who should have at least an inkling of the mechanics of this search are either clueless or tight-lipped.
Athletic Director Bill Hurst knows only that a search is being conducted.
Merced Union High Schools District Superintendent Scott Scambray hasn't been briefed on the proceedings, either.
"You'll have to talk to Craig about that one," he said from the stands at the Merced-Pitman boys basketball game on Wednesday.
Ah, Craig.
Mr. Chavez, Golden Valley's principal, hasn't returned a phone message or e-mail in two days.
See, no one's talking.
Which has to make you wonder, for the umpteenth time during this process: what the heck is going on?
Theories abound, but let's try to unravel this mystery one thread at a time.
Golden Valley fired Jon Betschart in November after the three unremarkable seasons at the helm.
Betschart went 9-21, including just 3-7 last fall.
It wasn't as though his short run at the top of the program was all stubbed toes and rain clouds.
There were some good moments sprinkled in. Just not enough to keep his role as head football coach.
Betschart united many of the area's football programs with an offseason weight-lifting competition and brought Friday night football games to the campus, injecting life into the half-built concrete monstrosity sitting on the north lawn.
But he was reportedly hard to work with, a bit on the stubborn side and buried in losses, so...
He had to go.
The next step was to place an ad on the Sac-Joaquin Section's Web site. That ad closed Dec. 28.
So all that's left between Golden Valley and its third-ever football coach is a series of interviews with the search committee.
Here's where everyone starts to look and sound like Sammy Sosa on Capitol Hill.
(Read: confused.)
Hurst said he only knew that Golden Valley was beginning interviews Thursday, and that he couldn't possibly be involved because he was in Florida and wouldn't be flying back till Thursday.
OK, for the sake of jet lag and counting revolutions at baggage claim, let's say he's out.
Scambray acknowledged that the school wanted somebody in place soon, but didn't know much more. And wouldn't speculate about Chavez's search.
Strike two.
Chavez has disappeared off the grid and probably won't resurface till after a hire is made.
So as far as we know, this Cadillac of a football position is humming down the highway with no one behind the wheel?
Or is there?
Maybe all three know exactly what's going on and, under pinky promises, have made a conscious decision to keep the media and general public in the dark. Which might be an acceptable business practice in the private sector, but at a public school, with a position as Johnny Public as the football coach, it comes across as fishy.
Is the public, especially Golden Valley's fan base, boosters and families, entitled to know the latest developments in the search? No.
But have they earned that measure of respect? You bet.
There's the other side to this coin, too. Maybe the AD, the supe and the principal are being completely honest. Maybe they're just as anxious as we are for the big news.
Imagine that -- parents waiting outside the delivery room while someone else gives birth to their child.
Hey, three men and a baby? It happens.
Until then, we'll take these rumblings on faith.
According to a handful of credible sources with intel on the search, including MUHSD assistant supe George Sziraki, an internal candidate -- aka district employee -- interviewed at the district office Thursday.
Our sources revealed that it was Jake Messina, a name that has been bandied about from the start of this search.
Everyone should be quite familiar with Messina, the defensive coordinator at Merced High during its championship run from 2006-08.
Messina, who stepped away from the Merced High program after the 2008 season, but remained on staff as a teacher, interviewed for this job three years ago.
Beyond that, it's any one's guess as to what the next step is. Or who the coach will be.
No one's talking.
And in basketball at least, that means you don't understand the play.
James Burns is sports editor of the Sun-Star. He can be reached at jburns@mercedsun-star.com.
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