‘It’s affected me a lot.’ Merced ICU nurse shares experience about worst of COVID pandemic
Vahn Castro couldn’t get used to one part of her job when she returned to the ICU at Mercy Medical Center Merced in January as a registered nurse back in January — one of the worst months of the COVID-19 pandemic.
It was placing patients in body bags during her 12-hour night shifts.
“I’d have to come in every night and almost every night I worked, I’d have to put the patient in the body bag,:” Castro said. “That was really tough for me. I don’t usually do that.”
Those are images that don’t fade away. Castro said there were some nights she would cry on her way to work, knowing what was awaiting her when she arrived in the ICU.
Zipping up body bags was not something Castro had to do often while working in the ICU for 19 years. Castro spent the past two years working as a nurse in the Mercy Outpatient Surgical Services and Endoscopy at the Mercy Outpatient Center.
However, on June 6 last year all outpatient procedures were canceled and the staff was sent back to the main campus to help out where they were needed.
Back in the ICU
Castro returned the ICU where she helped treat many patients infected with the coronavirus night after night.
“At the beginning, it was scary for me to be in the hospital in the first place because we were getting a lot of COVID patients,” Castro said. “It was also scary for the patients and the family because of the unknown.”
Castro wasn’t just scared for herself. She didn’t want to be exposed to the virus and bring it home to her husband of 30 years. She took precautions to prevent it — like never wearing her uniform in the house and using the same car to go to and from work.
Castro is one of the many local heroes working in the medical field who are putting their own health — and sometimes their lives — on the line to care for Merced County residents infected with COVID-19.
During the month of January there was 7,090 Merced County residents who were infected with the virus. There was only one day during the month that the Merced County Department of Public Health reported less than 118 cases per day.
There were 260 COVID-19 related deaths in the county since the start of the pandemic heading into 2021. By February 1, there were 354 deaths.
“It’s pretty hectic,” Castro said. “We have a lot of phone calls we are unable to answer for the family. We understand that they need information during that time. Once we’re in the COVID room we try to limit our time so we can also help the family because they are worried about their loved ones so it’s trying to find the balance between the patient’s care and the family.”
Communicating with families
With family unable to visit loved ones in the hospital suffering from COVID, the nurses are often their only line of communication. Castro and other nurses would hold smart phones so family can visit patients via FaceTime.
Castro says that was one of the toughest parts was watching families have to suffer because they couldn’t physically be in the hospital with their loved one, especially end-of-life situations.
“It’s very tough,” Castro said. “I would go home and I would think about my family and think about how I would deal with it if I can’t see my son or my sister. I try to associate this is my family, this is my patient’s family, how would I deal with it? I get really sad when I think about it.”
Some of the toughest moments were seeing the virus effect young people.
“To talk to the parents and tell them the patient is not doing well, that is tough for me,” she said. “I usually talk to the young family about grandpa, grandma. It’s affected me a lot, especially young patients.”
There were times Castro broke down and cried.
“My co-workers, we get exhausted, we get stressed,” Castro said. “Thanks to the community and being supportive, we were able to overcome the obstacles and still provide care for the patients.”
Respected by her peers
However, despite the emotional toll, Castro kept doing what she could to treat her patients. Castro has earned the respect of her fellow nurses.
“Vahn is patient, knowledgeable and a great teacher,” said Mayra Garcia, who worked with Castro when the ICU was flooded with COVID-19 patients. “She uses her common sense, she has a great personality, she is precise and above all an ethical nurse that fights for what she believes is right.”
“(Castro) is never late and very dependable,” said Lori Ramirez, who is the lead nurse in Castro’s department. “Good attitude and team player and is willing to take extra shifts if needed.”
Castro knew she wanted to become a nurse at a young age. She remembers as a young girl playing doctors and nurses. She got into the medical field because she wanted to help people.
Her greatest moments in the last few months have been seeing some of her patients recover from the virus.
“That’s the highlight,” Castro said. “That’s the happiness, when I see patients able to move from ICU up after they’re extubated. That’s when as a team, I feel like we accomplished something, when the patient is able to go to the seventh floor and they’re able to go to physical therapy.”
Good signs
Castro sees hope with the number of people with COVID-19 in the hospital declining and the case numbers falling in Merced County. For most of January there were over 50 county residents hospitalized with the virus with a high of 61 people in the hospital on Jan. 19. OmMarch 11 there were 21 people hospitalized in Merced County according to Department of Public Health data.
“I feel secure now that I received two vaccines and almost all my co-workers have received two vaccines,” Castro said.
Castro hopes we’ve turned a corner in the fight against COVID-19.
Castro doesn’t want to have to call people to update them how their loved one is struggling with the virus. She doesn’t want to see patients all alone in the ICU with their family unable to visit.
Castro hopes her nights of placing patients in body bags are soon over.
This story was originally published March 28, 2021 at 5:00 AM.
