Tune in to kids! First years of life supremely important

When my daughter went off to kindergarten, I went with her. I met her very first teacher, Mrs. Crane, and as a parent volunteer, I was assigned to a very short table to supervise a group of students. In no time at all, I was dismayed to realize that on that very first day of kindergarten, some students were already behind.

Really behind.

Education doesn’t begin on the first day of school. The first years of life are supremely important. Little brains develop at the speed of light and much is gained or lost during those years we can barely remember.

I watched a young father escort his little girl to school one morning. His hand lay between her shoulder blades as he gently propelled her toward the crosswalk in front of the school. His ear buds were in, and he bobbed his head to some tune, but not one word was exchanged between them.

I see mothers, engrossed with their cellphones, pushing carts down the grocery store aisles with an infant in front of them gazing off into space.

And then there is the driver who keeps his children entertained with vehicular technology, plugging in “Frozen,” and effectively creating a dead zone between the front and back seats of the SUV. To say nothing of the danger of driving next to me while I strain to figure out what the kids are watching one lane over.

It is easy to be self-righteous about all this. I confess I plugged in a video or two when I was tired and needed a moment to myself. I was a much better parent before I had children. I had plans to be wonderful and fell somewhat short, to be sure.

But I did play lots of 20 questions while driving, and I did buy a wonderfully illustrated book for each child’s birthday and Christmas. The Easter basket frequently had a book nestled into the jelly beans and chocolate eggs.

I was surprised, too, that my daughter’s kindergarten experience was a far cry from mine. I fondly remember nap time, graham crackers and warm milk. The curriculum I experienced included learning to tie shoes.

Now, entering kindergartners should know how to write their names, know their colors and recognize numbers. The world is moving faster for my children than it did for me. Technology is one of the many reasons that is so. It brings the world to a child’s fingertips, but it can also isolate parents from their children.

Who is a child’s first teacher? The answer isn’t Mrs. Crane in Room 5 or Mrs. M (short for something no youngster can pronounce) just down from the cafeteria.

The answer is Mom, Dad, Grandma or whoever is raising that child from birth to the moment his or her shadow graces an elementary schoolyard. New parents and the families of young children are serving as first teachers, perhaps not understanding the critical role they play.

My advice: Unplug the technology sometimes, and interact. On the way to school, in the store, driving in the car – class is in! The clock is ticking.

Talk to infants. Sing to youngsters. Read to little kids.

This story was originally published March 27, 2015 at 10:00 AM with the headline "Tune in to kids! First years of life supremely important."